Our friends who have 9 children in their homeschool family are starting to see their oldest leave home for college. The second oldest rattled off the names of colleges he has been accepted into, the Air Force Academy to name one. I was very excited for him. We live in an age now where the homeschooler is grown up (they actually survived), out of the house and making their way as adults in life (without having a social breakdown as some think) .
I have known 2 men (former homeschoolers) who worked with Tim in the EOD career field. OK well, maybe homeschoolers are crazy and demented but that is getting off the point I am trying to make.
It has been encouraging for me to see a finished product . I do struggle with the future for my children. How will they turn out? I am happy to see the lack of consistency in what defines a homeschool parent. They come in all shapes: 4 year degrees, high school diploma, some are real certified teachers.... most aren't. There is even the single parent thrown in the mix from time to time. Some provide a rigid curriculum, others are more laid back in their schedules and formality.
I want a how to book on everything. Tim once threatened to throw out all the "how-to" books in the house because I drive him crazy over "we need to do it this way". How to be a Christian, how to be a wife, how to be a mother, how to be a homeschool mom....then there are those "how to be __fill in the blank_____ and do it better" books.
I hate to admit that I am lazy and just want a book or a person to tell me how to do it...how to make me successful. I really just want someone to say do it this way and it will work out best. To myself I think..."Ask so and so how they do it cause their kids really seems to have it together." or "they seem really organized I must be doing it wrong". I have homeschooled for 6 years, read books, talked to many different types of homeschooling families and have never settled on any one way they have told me. Of course I have picked fruit from their trees and applied them where I need to but I haven't adopted any ONE method or copied exactly what another would do. (Against my desires to do so)
There are parenting methods, teaching methods, horse/dog training methods that are all different. Even when applying the same style, you get a different outcome. At some point (and I am slowly getting there) I am going to have to be confident in saying to myself and the world. "This is how I do it, it works for me". As long as I am not living in a world of sin that displeases God, he has given me freedom to raise my family, choose a career, live in a location that I desire and to his glory, I will be successful. He will accomplish his purpose he has for me in his way as well, unfortunately he won't provide a "HOW TO" book on that. That is where Trust comes into play.
2 comments:
This is a wonderful post, Anna - and i felt so encouraged reading it. I often struggle with thoughts of inadequecy. I look at what other people are doing and thing, "Oh I am ruining my kids because i am not doing that for them..." it's nice to know that I am not the only one who has those thoughts, and that it's okay to say "I'm doing it this way and it works for my family"
Thank you :) It's always hard for me to balance the "this is who we are" with the "we want to do better".
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